By Joanne Dunning (Manchester, England) FEB 23 | I think my child is gay....what do I do? Our Kids Are Alright – a new resource from the Lesbian & Gay Foundation (LGF) - aims to help answer that question.
One of the most frequently asked questions The LGF receive is from parents or family members asking, “I think my child is gay, what do I do?”
Our Kids Are Alright is a new guide which aims to help answer that question, it gives parents, family members and loved ones advice and support if they are unsure about what to do or how to react if their child or someone close to them has come out.
This guide really comes from the heart; the staff team at the LGF donated their tea and coffee money to ensure the guide was published, and to make sure that lesbian, gay and bisexual people get the love and support they deserve.
The release of the guide coincides with the run up to Oscar Night (Sunday Feb 27th) where the film The Kids Are All Right - which explores lesbian, gay and bisexual families (and inspired the guide’s name) - is nominated for a host of awards.
Mums and dads have shared their stories of their child - and in some cases more than one child - coming out to them as lesbian, gay or bisexual; they talk about how they responded, their concerns and the support they gave their children and found for themselves.
- “Then Lucy came out and it was a complete shock because I had no inkling and, of course, it meant that I now had no straight children. I was devastated for a while, in mourning for the daughters I thought I had lost.” Colette
- “My children will always be the same to me, regardless of their sexuality; I will always be supportive of them... After all it’s John and Kate’s life to live as they wish, as long as they are happy so am I.” Stuart
In some cases, their children also share their experiences of the courage it takes to come out to your parents and family, for fear of the unexpected and rejection.
- “I first knew that I had gay feelings when I was 14, but I didn’t come out untiI I was 24. For 10 years I managed to lie to myself and those around me.” Andrew
Lucy Rolfe, The Lesbian & Gay Foundation’s Wellbeing Co-ordinator says: “We wanted this guide to be as honest as possible and highlight peoples’ negative reactions as well as their positive ones, as every family has a different story to tell.
Our Kids Are Alright features lots of practical advice; from what to say and what not to say, myth-busting about what this might mean for families and their children, and signposts to groups, resources and other parents who might be able to help those who are struggling to understand.
Whether you are a parent or family member of a lesbian, gay or bisexual person, or think your child might be questioning their sexual orientation, if you are a family friend, or are the person struggling to come out, or maybe you have and it has gone badly, this guide can help.”
You can download Our Kids Are Alright here, or email info@lgf.org.uk to get a copy. For more information call 0845 3 30 30 30 or email lucy.rolfe@lgf.org.uk
Praise for Our Kids Are Alright...
- “It is excellent - lots of good information and positive stories from parents and will be a fantastic resource for those just coming to terms with their child's sexuality." Inga
- “Fab booklet - really interesting to read, and I think it'll be a big help to any parents in that situation.” Joe
- “What a fantastic resource. I would have loved to have had something like this at the start of last year. Trouble is that it's not something you necessarily know you need until you need it.” Linda
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