Asher Brown Truong Family Photo August 2010
By Mark Singer (Washington DC) SEPT 28 | Asher Brown, a 13 year old 8th grader at Hamilton Middle School in the Cypress-Fairbanks School District in Houston, Texas, shot himself in the head with his step-father's 9mm Berretta late last week. His parents, Amy and David Truong told the Houston Chronicle newspaper that their son was "bullied to death." Chronicle Staff Writer Peggy O'Hare reported in yesterday's Edition:Asher Brown's worn-out tennis shoes still sit in the living room of his Cypress-area home while his student progress report — filled with straight A's — rests on the coffee table. The eighth-grader killed himself last week. He shot himself in the head after enduring what his mother and stepfather say was constant harassment from four other students at Hamilton Middle School in the Cypress-Fairbanks Independent School District.
Cypress-Fairbanks School District spokeswoman Kelli Durham denied that officials had received any previous complaints from students, faculty, or the parents regarding Brown's treatment. Outraged, the boy's mother said:Brown, his family said, was "bullied to death" — picked on for his small size, his religion and because he did not wear designer clothes and shoes. Kids also accused him of being gay, some of them performing mock gay acts on him in his physical education class, his mother and stepfather said. The 13-year-old's parents said they had complained about the bullying to Hamilton Middle School officials during the past 18 months, but claimed their concerns fell on deaf ears. David and Amy Truong said they made several visits to the school to complain about the harassment. Amy Truong said she made numerous phone calls to the school that were never returned.
"That's absolutely inaccurate — it's completely false," Amy Truong said. "I did not hallucinate phone calls to counselors and assistant principals. We have no reason to make this up. … It's like they're calling us liars."
O'Hare also wrote:
On the morning of his death, the teen told his stepfather he was gay, but Truong said he was fine with the disclosure. "We didn't condemn," he said. The Truongs say they just want the harassment to stop so other students do not suffer like their son did and so another family does not have to endure such a tragedy.
"Our son is just the extreme case of what happens when (someone is) just relentless," Amy Truong said. To the bullies, she added, "I hope you're happy with what you've done. I hope you got what you wanted and you're just real satisfied with yourself."
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8 comments:
THIS MADNESS HAS SIMPLY JUST GOT TO END!
Somewhere along the line, we as adults, as a community, as leaders within organizations skewed to offer aid and assistance to troubled youth (regardless of their origin or sexual orientation) are missing the mark.
Hot on the heals of the tragic death of 15-year-old Indiana teenager Billy Lucas, we learn yet of another tragedy. I have to ask myself "How is it that Asher Brown, in particular, or any troubled teenager for that matter, could not have possibly heard about the nationwide (sic. Worldwide) outrage Billy's death had wrought, and the outpouring of support that was, and is, available to any youth in trouble should the need ever arise?"
Folks, we're just not getting the message across; it's somehow just not getting through to where it matters most and to those who are most in need. It's not a question of funding; the money is there and it's being used to extend (and expand) over-worked services already in place, many of which have been pro-active in this arena for many, many, years. Still the tragedies continue, escalating at an alarming pace.
We need to re-think this, and quickly. We need to return to the grass-roots and task parents and families, our neighbours, service groups, schools, police and emergency personnel, libraries, community centres and religious institutions with the responsibility to ensure that our next generation of young people are not going to be found wanting for our love, our care, our support and nurturing and most importantly of all, our acceptance for their being able to grow and prosper through their being simply who they are, and not through what our expectations for them need be.
Warren C. E. Austin
The Gay Deceiver
Toronto, Canada
Warren is right, that the mark is being missed, but one has to wonder if maybe the target is part of the problem.
Aiming a message of love and concern at youth will not help, because the cause of their immediate problem is not lack of love, but lack of support under the bullying. The denial of administrations that they've even received complaints shows, all too clearly, that the institutions themselves are the problem. IF all administrations fully denounced bullying, and took action, there would still be problems, as they can't be everywhere. However, by not taking action, they promote the bullying.
The messages need to be aimed at the administrators, and secondarily at parents. COMPLAINTS NEED TO BE IN WRITING, AND CLEAR, AND ACTED UPON IMMEDIATELY.
While we may think this is a sexual orientation issue, it is not. Bullying kids (and adults) use any number of bits of ammunition in their attacks, and while we can argue about the reason for their esteem issues that cause them to behave this way, that is like arguing about why there are speeders on the highway, and road rage, while doing nothing about it. Enforcement first and foremost; counselling later, when we aren't dealing with another body.
The only way of stopping this new US National Sport of hounding school colleagues to death is to expose each and every episode, to blog opinions and get them circulated widely, to use social media and share links. So share the link on Facebook and on twitter, and share other links, too.
I just finished a blog article on it myself. Brody may like it enough to make it a guest post here as he sometimes does.
We can deprecate it all we like, but we must make sure we preach not only to the choir, but to those who will reject us time and time again.
It's not about sexual orientation, it;s about schools and school administrators being out of control. And that comes from poor national leadership. Obama in the USA inherited a mess. Everything that faces him is top priority. And this is no different.
We are meant to invest in our kids.
I wonder what would happen if all kids treated the teachers, administrators and other adult school staff in exactly the same way. Call them names, trip them, accidental slams in the hallways, etc. I suspect that these adults have no idea of how vicious it all is, and that might be at least part of the problem.
I had already been working on a blog entry about this topic, as I'm assuming Tim was writing his own. He is so on the mark. We must, all of us, write, and link, and condemn and post that comdenation wherever and whenever more of the same crops up.
My Blog was until this morning simply a place-holder awaiting an issue worthy of my indignation. It has found one.
http://thegaydeceiver.blogspot.com/
Warren C. E. Austin
The Gay Deceiver
Toronto, Canada
Warren, I tried to leave a comment on your blog, but it got too complex with identity challenges. I was going to point out that I couldn't find the list of agencies you were going to have in the sidebar.
BTW, I see you now have those links.
The page ... hell the whole damn Blog is now a work in progress. The links are problematic in that I'm having to re-composite images for each link in order that they might fit the format I'd chosen, perhaps ill-advisedly it now turns out; but, I'll learn t live with it over time.
Links for some of the more prominent "local" services, Covenant House and Eva's Place for example are forthcoming as are others for various health and wellness services.
I'll have to look at the failure to be able to comment issue in the morning.
Any comment or thoughts about the format wil be welcomed should anyone care to provide them; kindly send them to my Blog e-Mail address: thegaydeceiver@gmail.com.
Warren C. E. Austin
The Gay Deceiver
Toronto, Canada
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