Brody's Scribbles... Bilerico's Waymon Hudson-Family Values: Who Is It Trying to "Destroy Marriage" Again?

By Waymon Hudson (Oakland Park, Florida) June 17 | In a move that isn't that surprising (but which nonetheless stings), Proposition 8 supporters want to 'revoke recognition' of the 18,000 legal same-sex marriages that occurred in California before the marriage ban went into effect. Removing any doubt about how far they want to push their anti-equality agenda, the proponents asked Judge Vaughn Walker to strip any rights or recognition of the marriages performed before Prop 8 passed: 

As the trial over California's prohibition on same-sex marriage enters its final stage today, the ban's sponsors are urging the judge to go a step further and revoke state recognition of the marriages of 18,000 gay and lesbian couples who wed before voters passed Proposition 8. Such an order would honor "the expressed will of the people," backers of the November 2008 ballot measure said Tuesday in their final written filing before Chief U.S. District Judge Vaughn Walker.Andrew Pugno, an attorney for Prop. 8's backers, said in an interview that the sponsors aren't asking Walker to nullify the 18,000 marriages, but only to rule that government agencies, courts and businesses no longer have to recognize the couples as married.

See? Not nullify, only remove any recognition or rights associated with those marriages, thereby making them useless. So which group is trying to destroy the institution of marriage again? Those are some "family values"...

I'm one of those 18,000 couples.

Waymon Hudson & Husband Anthony   Photo By Waymon Hudson

My husband and I married in California before Prop 8 passed and are among the Limited Edition Married Gays that exist in a separate and not equal space when it comes to relationship recognition. Now the same people that have claimed time and again that we are somehow weakening their marriages by simply being together are actively seeking to strip us of any rights or recognition our marriage provides us. Follow the twisted logic? Nope, Me either.

It is amazing to me that those claiming religious and moral high ground are the ones actively seeking to destroy the legal, existing marriages of 18,000 couples. Hypocrisy isn't a strong enough word to describe the stance of these people. To have these groups literally seek to break up marriages because of their own personal bias is disgusting. They will not be satisfied until they can come into our home, take our marriage certificate of the wall, and rip it in half. Yet somehow they continue to wear (with the help of a increasingly lazy media) the mantle of "family value" voters and proponents. 

How can taking away my family's rights and recognition be a "family value"? How can telling children of same-sex couples that their parents are less-than and abhorrent in their anti-equality campaigns be protecting families? Why do they still get to claim any sort of family values at all?

The Prop 8 backers and those like them have never been able to provide any proof of harm to their marriages or the institution of marriage by allowing same-sex couple to join in. Their arguments boil down to personal distaste or outright bigotry- hardly sound legal reasons.

The dishonesty of their stance needs to be challenged by everyone around them. They need to be forced to answer how they claim the are for "saving" marriage while trying to destroy legal, existing marriages like mine. They need to answer how they are "pro-family" while demonizing our families and children. They need to be pushed and pushed until the world sees them for what they are: small-minded people with deep prejudice, not some crusading do-gooders who "just have political differences" with equality for all.

I'm gay. I'm married. I'm pro-family. I have family values. They don't get to own these terms. They belong to all of us. And I won't cede them to the likes of these people any more. 

Waymon Hudson is President and Co-Founder of Fight OUT Loud , a national non-profit organization dedicated to helping LGBT individuals and their allies fight discrimination and hate. He is a vocal community activist and LGBT rights advocate. Waymon is also a political consultant, focusing on new media/social networking and youth outreach. Waymon is a frequent contributor as well as a Managing Editor of The Bilerico Project and has his own personal site located here.